


Of Course I Don't Want To Feel Better

by Highclasstrash



Series: Tumblr Prompts by Highclasstrashposts [17]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Character Death, F/M, Grief/Mourning, Post-Season/Series 03, Pre-Season/Series 04, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-08
Updated: 2021-01-08
Packaged: 2021-03-12 01:46:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28627488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Highclasstrash/pseuds/Highclasstrash
Summary: Song: Feel Better by Penelope ScottShip: staticquake from Agents of ShieldPromted by anonymous on Tumblr.
Relationships: Lincoln Campbell/Skye | Daisy Johnson, Phil Coulson & Skye | Daisy Johnson
Series: Tumblr Prompts by Highclasstrashposts [17]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1774090
Comments: 1
Kudos: 16





	Of Course I Don't Want To Feel Better

_"A moment ago, it was the first time_ _I_ _said I love-"_

Daisys heart had stopped, her lungs had frozen mid exhale, and she wasn't sure they had resumed their primary functions in the days and weeks that had followed those words. But they must have, because she was still roaming the Earth. Lincoln was still gone.

_"Saving the girl_ _I_ _love and the world at the same time? Seems pretty right to me."_

He loved her. Someone loved Daisy. She loved him, too. She never got to say it back. 

Her entire life, nobody bad ever loved her like Lincoln had. Nobody had ever made her feel worthy of being loved. Daisy had finally earned someone's love, she earned _his_ love.

A knock sounded at the door to her bunk, which she hadn't left in days. Simmoms had brought meals that were barely touched, and that had been the only human interaction Daisy had had in almost a month.

"Sk-- Daisy?"

It was Coulson.

"Can I come in?"

Daisy hadn't used her voice in days, she couldn't form an answer. Not that she knew what she wanted to say.

Coulson cautiously stepped into her bunk. He looked her over carefully, taking in her pale face, dark circles under sunken, bloodshot eyes, her hair that had gone unwashed for over a week, the same shirt hanging off her shoulders; a shirt that looked a size larger than it had a month prior.

Daisy didn't acknowledge his presence, just stared blankly ahead. She felt the bed sink under his weight.

"Daisy . . ." Coulson started slowly, as if he didn't know what to say. But Daisy knew better. She knew he wouldn't have come if he didn't have a speech planned out. "We're all worried about you." His voice was so soft, but somehow stern. "I . . . I know it's hard, I know it hurts, but you still need to take care of yourself." He place a gentle hand on her arm. "You'll feel better if you eat something."

Daisy moved, suddenly. She moved away from Coulson and looked at him with accusatory betrayal. 

" _Hurts?_ " Her voice cracked, volume barely above a whisper. "Of course it hurts," her voice grew louder and rougher. "Of course it fucking hurts!" She stood up on shaking legs--no, her legs weren't shaking, the room was. "I don't want to feel better, I don't want to get over him!" She clenched her fists as fresh tears welled in her eyes and she screamed at Coulson. 

In an instant, she was breaking down in his arms again as they sank to the floor. 

She was gone the next day. 

She bought a van that reminded her of her life before S.H.I.E.L.D, before things went completely, horribly wrong. She remembered Charles -- Charlie -- who had shown her the image of the cross floating right before the flames. 

Daisy remembered his daughter, barely in Kindergarten. Daisy knew what it was like to grow up without a father. She couldn't give Robin her dad back, but she could give her mother the means to give them both a good life.

She was branded as a thief, a terrorist who brought down bridges after robbing banks, a radical political figure that was trying to level the scales of society. 

Daisy beat the shit out of a man who she saw assaulting a woman half his size, and that was when she became Quake.

No matter how many people loved or hated her, idolized or demonized her for her actions, no matter what she did, her thoughts always wandered back to dark blond hair. Bright blue eyes, electric blue, to be poetic, dry hands from washing them all the time. 

A man with a kind smile and dangerous eyes, an intense calling to help people, an imence knowledge and willingness to learn and grow, a sister, a man who loved her.

Daisy still couldn't belive he loved her. She repeated his last words to her constantly. 

_"It was the first time I said I love-"_

_I love_ _you_ _._

He loved her.

Someone loved her.

Daisy didn't even know he had a sister until Coulson brought up notifying his family. She loved someone she barely knew.

She loved him, and she hated him.

She hated him for being so _good_. So heroic.

She hated that she didn't get a chance to meet his sister. 

Daisy would give anything to see him again, to just sit with Lincoln for just a moment. To be with him.

She threw herself into dismantling the Watchdogs, hoping that preventing them from hurting anyone would help her; hoping that it would make her feel better.

But she didn't want to feel better.


End file.
